Can you love two people at the same time?

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In the early days of a relationship, we also tend to see one another through rose tinted spectacles — we have an idealised image of our loved one, and it can be hard to cope when their less attractive traits start to show, in the cold light of day. My current age is 16 and i really need your help asap and im kind to read all of your advices or suggestions for me.

In the beginning, I thought he would only be my friend. I feel disconnected with my husband and connected to my ex.

Can you love two people at the same time?

Can you ever be in love with two people at the same time? Of course, you can. But can you carry it off without breaking hearts? Have you ever been in love with two people at the same time? While it may infuriate your partner or seem morally unethical, falling in love with two people is as simple as falling in love with one person. After all, love is an emotion that can be experienced when the symptoms are right. You fall in love. Now you meet someone else. You fall in love again with a new person! Many teenagers and even lovers in committed relationships feel threatened when they find themselves in love with two people. I remember experiencing the same conflicting feelings a few years ago while I was in a relationship with my boyfriend now ex! He had to travel to conduct his research for a year and a half, and there I was, all alone and waiting for him to return. And incidentally, I met another guy whom I really liked. And he liked me too. A month later, I was madly in love with this new guy I had met. But then again, I was still in love with my own boyfriend too. So there I was, confused and deliriously happy. I was in love with two people and I was ecstatic with the fact that I had two people who loved me back! I felt like a wily temptress who was luring single men into her bed. It just seemed wrong. It could happen to anybody. Can a person fall in love with two people at the same time? The answer is simple, yes, you can. But the bigger question is, do you want to? Falling in love with two people and holding both of them close to your bosom is not as easy as it sounds. At the same time, love is not and has never been a once in a lifetime experience. You fall in love with different people in different ways. And at times, you end up feeling romantically excited towards two different people at the same time. If you really want to, you can avoid falling in love with a second person by simply taking a step back and putting a stop to the flirty conversations and the sneaky dates. And almost always, they assume the new lover is sexier, more loving and more caring. But is that really true? Remember, sexual passion may fizzle out as the years go by, but true love matures into a happy relationship. On the other hand, a new lover may excite you and remind you of your earlier years in love, but you have to realize that the lusty excitement of the new secret relationship will only last for a few months or a few years. So if you ever have to compare your lovers, compare them for the compatibility instead of the passion. After all, there are always ways to bring back the sexual chemistry even in an older relationship. So the best way to deal with the problem of being romantically involved with two people is to walk away from one person. Would you partner accept it? If you want to be in love with two people at the same time, you have to let both your partners know about it. Do you think your partner would have the emotional maturity and strength to accept your choice? You have two lovers, and you get to have twice the fun all the time. What would you do if your partner wants to get even and tries to have a sexual relationship with someone else just to satiate their bruised ego? Can you deal with that? While such forms of love are commonly accepted without any psychological effects in some scenarios, it can lead to confusing relationships in other cases over the long term. The answer is subjective, but simple. Do what you feel is right. In most cases, the best possible way to deal with falling in love with two people would be to break away from one relationship and live happily with the other. Crushes come and go, and even if it does turn serious, you always have the option of walking away from a new prospective lover if you must. So unless you really have no choice, try not to fall in love with two people at the same time! How are you dealing with it? Or what are the consequences of it? Share your stories here. Liked what you just read? Loving two men is really frustrating and hurtful…i have been with my boyfriend for almost two years already and i even live with him but i fell head over heals for my best friend who has liked me for the longest time…. You may meet someone who has so much more in common with you than your current partner and although you love your current partner,you long to have this magical romance with the other one you have fallen for. I m in a long distance relationship with my boyfriend. I love him a lot. I really wanna marry him and have kids with him. But there is another guy. A good friend of mine who is here in the same city. People can talk about the morals, the troubles, the problems with such a situation but nobody can deny the beautiful feeling when you are loved so much. I believe I have discovered two different ways in which you can love a man. Unfortunately, I also love his best friend in a different way. They are like opposites. Glen is sweet, sensitive, committed, and has been incredible to me for all this time and I can easily imagine my life with him. Tom is very opinionated, sort of wild, but still passionate and kind. We used to hate each other because our opinions clashed and we both are very strong willed. It obviously seems clear which one I should be with to the outsider. Any helpful coping mechanisms would be great. I have been married for 10 years now to a wonderful man, and each day the love we share just gets stronger! I hate this because I used to be a firm believer in not cheating and loving one person for the rest of your life, I never thought I would find myself in the hot seat! Where no real answer seems to be the right one… for now all I do is just take it one day at a time and see where fate leads me. Being in love is completely different then loving any one. So if you THINK your in love with two people.. You really are in love with the second one and not the first. Now the first person you were in love with you love them and care for them. I have always taken him back because I love him and care so much about him. Over the past month or so I have fallen head over heels for this new guy who lives about a 2 hour plane ride away. My boyfriend or ex bf wants me back and is willing to change everything to make me happy, he loves me and wants to marry me. The new guy likes me a lot and wants to see me happy and just not to get back together with my ex bf. If I choose between them I lose one of them. But another man has started talking to me he has depression as well and he gets what im going through and i can talk to him so easily and im completely comfortable with him.. Between my dating others and the friendship and professional relationship we developed, it took a year for him to finally tell me how he felt — I was unsure, but we started dating. He was wonderful and silly and fun, but then four months later he broke up with me due to growing stress over work and his illness. I was unexpectedly devastated. But at a show about eight months ago that he hosted, I met someone else. He listened to me, he did everything he could to comfort me even when I all I could talk about was the lingering pain and anxiety from the first guy, and even after all the horrible, jealous pain I put him through he still wanted me to stay. I kept pushing him away, thinking the first guy was finally going to ask me back, then he would seek me out again and would tell me that it was all going to be alright. Just five months ago now the first guy asked me back out. I wonder what my life would be like with him. We have painful, silent phone calls, and occasionally I run into him — the most recent time we kissed. I know I have to tell my boyfriend, I know I have to be honest. I love them both. I had an affair with this guy… I still love this guy and my partner too. This works for a time, but not forever. You CAN be in love with two people at the same time. However, in most cases, you CANNOT have your cake and eat it, too. My girlfriend brought in another girl who i happened to like in the past. Now i cant find myself not thinking of them. I smell them whereever i go, even if i am in a place they have never been, i dream of them, and never could hurt them. I have been with my current boyfriend for 5 years. We knew each other through mutual friends for years before this but nothing ever came of it. My best guy friend I have known about 7 years. We are close in regards that we talk to one another a lot about everything. We have been extremely emotionally intimate I guess is what you could say. He is attractive physically, but I am drawn to the way I am able and he is able to communicate. We have basically grown close because of writing to one another about situations in our lives. When my current boyfriend and I were19 and he was 23 at the time we started dating. Me and my best guy friend were also growing closer to a more than friend level. We never did anything intimate except that I gave him a massage. However I felt drawn to him and knew I wanted something but waited for him to make a move. Now 5 years later my boyfriend and I have our own apartment and two children together. I feel like I am the one constantly moving the relationship forward. He is a great father, he takes care of me, he is loyal, he loves me for me and I am okay being myself with him. Over the years I have struggled with the way his family is and I have helped him to break away a lot from them and how they treat him. IN regards to finances especially they really control his life. They still have access to his finances and pay his bills with his money and pay their own with some of it. This leaves us with no room to more forward with our future together for us or our children. Around the time I got pregnant with my second child I started to lose focus of my relationship. I was having mixed feelings about where to go with him. I felt like I was the one pushing for us to have a future together and be married. I know he cares about me and loves me but i just started to lose that feeling of wanting to be intimate. At the same time I got back in touch with my friend, the guy I had wanted to be with but never made the moves. Well, my best guy friend and I were talking about getting together around the time my daughter was born, just to talk and hang out. Well, instead of doing this, I introduced him to one of my single mother girl friends and they hit it off. So well we did for about 5 months now and he and my friend got a little serious, but this past week they decided to call it quits. I love him I really do. I cry knowing he is hurt right now. He told me all he really wants for his birthday is someone to like him. Im just going with our day to day flow with our kids, we go to bed at night, I say I love you. I kiss him but I feel nothing. And when we hang out and we talk I get that tingle inside. I feel young and flirty and fun again. I want to feel that way. I want to fall in love again. BUt I love my friend because of the person he is, the way I feel when I am around him and the fact that he is someone I know I can always go too. Can anyone tell me what should I do? The other man was always there for me to talk to, and he made me feel great about myself and always told me how smart I was. That was almost a year ago, but I still feel like I love that man more than I do my own spouse. My husband and his friend and I all decided one night to experiment with sharing me sexually. It was a consensual chioce between us 3. We all 3 talked about it. My boyfriend decided he was getting jealous of sharing me with my husband and my husband felt wierd about that. It feels as though my boyfriend cant share me, or see me ever becoming his own, so he ended the realtionship 2 days ago. I am hurting so bad and my husband supports me but he just doesnt understand. I read these stories from you all and most of them are about secret affairs. I accepted my bf because I felt like I could have a future with him. At the same time. In the beginning we hardly talked, I always thought he was a snob. In the last year or so, we have gotten much Closer. We always go to breakfast and lunch together, he shares food with me, and we text a lot outside of work. ESP after he hugged me and told me he will miss me. Only then I realized how much he meant to me. Actually when we first became good friends I remember being mortified at the idea of kissing him on the lips but now I think I wish I had the chance. Am I in love with him? I just feel so happy with him. Which makes it illogical to want to have a life long relationship.. I wish I could always be in this space where I could just be plain and happy with my colleague. Just holding hands and cuddling, definitely a new idea since most relationships end up with some sort of intimacy and also baby making! I can say that d relationship is ok but I can feel that I am not happy anymore. Then 3 yrs ago me and my 1st love started communicating each other. At first we just reminisced what happen to both of us. But after a month my old feelings for him started to grow again. And the worst part is dat I love him more than my husband. For now we still communicating each other, and the worst thing is that my feelings for him is getting deeper. I want to leave my husband for him but I dont what to do or how to start. I want to be with him for the rest of our lives. We had been friends for a couple years before we had started dating and I fell head over heels for this guy. Incredibly handsome, smart, talented musician , very committed, determined, etc. He became my best friend. But, we have somewhat of a long distance relationship. And he is straight-edge. Occasionally go to parties and do my own thing with my friends. We have two different lifestyles but still, we fell in love and it was completely amazing in the beginning. But I also love someone else. We have known each other for quite awhile, as we live in the same town. We are just alike. We enjoy the same music, have the same opinions, and we laugh at each others joke. He likes me for me. At least from what I can tell. Like, 6 years older. We became friends through mutual friends and talking to each other. And next thing I knew, we were texting every single day. Making sure one another was okay and talking about our lives and what we were interested in. We had talked about hanging out for quite some time. So one day I went to his house. Before I even got in the car to go over there I felt like throwing up. I had butterflies like crazy. I was so anxious and nervous to see him. It ended up just being us sitting outside for hours just talking. We hung out a few other times and it was the same thing. But our texts started getting more serious and we had both told each other how we felt. We knew that we both cared about one another. And we would do anything for the other. So, the last time I went to hang out with him…there was a lot of weird tension and at times it was awkward. But it was only because we wanted to be close to each other. He would put his arm around me, kiss my cheek, tell me I was perfect, hold my hand here and there. And of course cuddling lead to other things. But when we kissed and touched it was so raw, and passionate. We wanted each other so badly. But I LOVE my boyfriend. I have developed stronger feelings for both of them than I could have ever Imagined. My feelings are so unfair. Loving two people at once is so painful. Or even lose both. I just wish it was okay to love two at once. He is so sweet and kind to me…but the problem is. I am still In love with my ex we dated for 3 years. I feel like I never was over my ex when I started dating my now boyfriend. My ex and were young and so I love. My boyfriend now has no clue about me talking to my ex. He actually broke up with me going into our 4th year of the relationship; he wanted to be single. During that time I became extremely close to another man. He and I were like two peas in a pod. We got along great and are very complatible. But he was in a commited relationship at the time. My ex came back about a year later and I took him back. I completely stopped communicating with the other guy because I wanted to put my all into my BF. Its been about a year and a half now and I have started to communicate with the other guy again. This time I am not so happy with my relationship, and he is no longer in a relationship. I have found that my feelings for him never went away and I feel like he is the man for me. I can see us being together for a long time. But Im so confused because I love my bf very much and we have been through alot together. I just dont know what to do. I have been with my bf for a short period of time but the things he has done to me… no woman should have to sustain it! He treats me really bad, ignoring me and being abusive! Now for me to decide. Since my boyfriend NOW realizes he has competition, he has now turned into MR LOVA LOVA! He wants me to come back n fall in love. I now know I am not alone. I have been married for 5 and a half years to an amazing man. He is the type of guy that will bend over backwards for me. I love him but not the way I used to. Problem is, an ex of mine and I started communicating with each other about 2 years ago. He was the first guy I ever loved so it was hard for me when he left for his tour. That was10 years ago. Anyway, we have been chatting a lot and have realized how much we still love each other. All was well until we had to say goodbye. My friends waited in the cab for me while I said goodbye to my ex. Worse than when we broke up. I did not want to let go of our hug. We have a connection that I have never had with anyone else ever. As we were breaking away from our hug, he kissed me. My girlfriends made sure of it. I told my husband everything when I returned home. My ex and I have talked and I am making plans to go and see him on my own. With no distractions this time. I am extremely honest with both of these men. I felt no guilt about the kiss and I have yet to feel guilt about planning to go see him again. I know I am selfish but what are you supposed to do when your heart is split in 2? I feel disconnected with my husband and connected to my ex. He is the sweetest nicest attractive guy that says the nicest things to me that my bf never said to me. My bf is young and still learning alot of relationship type things so i understand and all, but sometimes hes just straight up rude to me but i love him alot and we always have a good time together usually. When im with that other guy tho, he blushes and always says he loves talking to me and just always makes me smile. He also has a gf tho, thats the thing we both are in the exact situation. I love both of them. What do i do? One is younger than me and I have been seeing him for about 2 years. I do not see him that much, but when I do, I adore him. He has stressed to me that he is not interested in getting too involved and likes it the way it is. We occasionally sleep together. Because he feels this way, I figured, well then it would be ok to meet someone else,which is what happened. He also likes to be with me but doesnt want to get too involved, we also sleep together but not very much at all. I had told the first one that I had met someone else and slept with them and he was angry and said that I had cheated on him. I didnt think so. The other says it is my choice if I would see someone else but that he would not like if I slept with someone else. If one of them would commit, I would leave the other. Of course I would miss which ever one it is, but I want a relationship and I would enjoy one with either one of them. One of which I have been on and off with for abou three years, the other one I have had a connection with for about a year. Like you, I never thought it would be possible for me to love two people at once, but they are totally different from each other and I love all things abou each of them. When I with the 3 year guy he makes me feel safe and secure, and I can tell by the way he talks and by his actions that he truly does love me. What should I do? Long-distance, got to see each other twice a month. I love him dearly I want to marry him. Meeting new friends, going to places, work, etc. These two years have been wonderful, if not, perfect! We never had a single argument or fight. Im always so calm when Im with him. As much as I want this to work, I fell for someone else. At work, I fell for a new person I met. In the beginning, I thought he would only be my friend. He ended up showing so much love towards me. He was so attracted to me. I think you know how the story goes. I ended up breaking up with my boyfriend to be with him. I came to realize how much argument I get into with my new boyfriend. Now that I think back, he was quite mature handling it. My ex forgave me and said we could still be friends. In fact, we are really best friends now. I am happy where I am right now. I am really thankful that my ex decided to be my best friend instead of ignoring me. I remember once in an argument with my current boyfriend, I told him that both of them were important to me. In different ways, of course. To this day, I still wonder why my ex forgave me and decided to be my best friend. I think I still have time to decide. I bet, all three of us believe that time will tell. Time really will tell. I wish someday Lord Jesus can lead my way and write my love story. Lord, I love you. I also believe that he who loves you most, will see most clear. I dont know what to do as my sex life with my current bf is terrible and I just dont feel comfortable being with him. Im getting married in a few months and I couldnt be happier. I love my fiance he and I are a good match in almost everything, However there is this other guy who I have been friends with for a while and have had feelings for. I pegged it as a crush and pushed it away. I finally go the courage to do something about it. And I couldnt be happier with the result I love spending time with him. I know that when I get married this relationship cant continue. But I dont feel guilty because It dosent feel wrong to be with him or both of them. Me and him have been inseparable our whole relationship, until I met his friends brother. He ended up trying to talk to me and we hung out a few times too with my boyfriend also. We ended up getting drunk and having sex. We hid it from everyone for a while. Then I broke up with my boyfriend to be with him. After a month I told him I still love my boyfriend and I needed to be with him. We got bak together and the other guy got mad. He ended up telling everyone about our relationship, bit I denied everything. My boyfriend refused to let me ever see or talk to my secret lover again. But to this day I still talk to him every night, and for longer then my actual boyfriend. I tried to tell myself I was not in love with him. And here I am. What makes it complicated is that he introduced me to this other person they are friends. The other guy is so sweet, smart, funny, considerate, and has many great qualities. I find myself thinking about him all the time. Even cheated on me when we were in a long distance relationship which turned into being engaged. We just bought a house but had no children. We separated and divorced. I met my then bf who was the best lover ever…but after a year he needed space. K, then the ex started coming around. I was dating both. But ended up re-marrying the ex. Years later the ex bf found me and we had an affair. But then ended it. I love them both. But now I have 2 kiddos…I dont have the right to be selfish. Not so black and white when it comes to love. Everyone has a story. The issues are that I am in love with my new girlfriend, who is great and is where I am living for the foreseeable future. But just the love and passion I have for my ex is so much more powerful currently than they are for her. Just wanted to vent, anybody out there have an opinion let me know please! I live in a small town where multiple lovers is really not acceptable at all. The last lover lasted three years and ended my marriage after my husband fell in love with someone else. Anyway, here I am, divorced and living alone on another continent than my husband. I have a sweet, loving boyfriend who also has an angry streak. I see another man about once a month and our erotic play is thrilling. I feel like moving away and clearing out my life of these emotional difficulties!!! The alternative of several changing partners, is not very satisfying either. I was also with my boyfriend for almost two years. Me and my boyfriend were going through a lot of problems and were about to break up. I was hanging out with my best guy friend as he came out to me that he always liked me, kissed me and then we ended up having sex. It felt to right and perfect, but I too also felt horrible for cheating on my boyfriend. I broke up with my boyfriend after that, but I still care and love him very much but at the same time I care about my best friend a lot too and this new found connection between us feels so right. I know that they both deeply care about me and they both want to be with me. I am so lost on what to do. About 3 years ago, I met this amazing man, who I just connected with, in the most unique, most unexpected way. He liked me for who I was. But our timing was never right. He lives an hour away from me. We occasionally hung out, and when we did, it just felt right. It was just something that you did. But timing was still not right. The distance was his main issue above all. Which is what I have waited for all along. My heart has always belonged to him. I have also, met someone who i believe is my soul mate. Lost my virginity to this man. I have never felt more comfortable and more myself with this man. I love him more than anything in this world. My heart and head tell me two different things. Go with the man who stole your heart 3 years ago? I know deep down who I should choose. That your heart has belonged to someone else. I have been married for 11 yrs and have two kids with my hubby who I love very much, however I have alot loved a man I have known pre my husband, we lost contact for a few years and found each other again, he is now married with three kids but we always loved each other and I know it is despicable but reality is I love him he loves me, and same with our partners. Also, for my kids sake I need to really end all of this not sure how to approach this? I simply refer to it as a dead end because it lacks growth. We have been through a lot together. This second man came into my life a year ago. I met him in the most suspecting place at work. I would ignore his stares. I would ignore his attempts in trying to spark up a conversation. I decided to let my guard down and help him with a particular task at work. Speaking to him made me feel like he was worth my time in getting to know. The tricky thing about love is that it is unconditional. While my boyfriend has a career. He has never been in jail. He comes from a two parent household of loving parents who have been married for over 30 years. I love them very much. My boyfriend is a very easy-going and calm person. He was technically in a relationship when we met. He soon broke up with that girlfriend and we began dating. The first year was rough because he was fooling around with another woman. I had to ask him to make our relationship exclusive. Two years had passed and things were starting to go well. To make a long story short, my boyfriend had been carrying on multiple affairs for years. When I call him out on it he acts as if its something I can get over. He then promises to be true. But now he has all these female friends that he claims are innocent. Been trying to break up but keep getting sucked back in because of the love I have for him. As with the other, he grew up in a broken home. He had to survive by selling drugs and becoming part of a gang. He is in and out of jail. I try to help him with showing how to be positive and live on the right side of the tracks. He keeps saying he loves me and so glad how I bring positivity to his life. But I worry about him getting locked up of getting killed. I feel like I have to be a voice of reason, Sighs. My first love and I started talkinq again we havent talked in a long time but after all that time I still feel that we have feelings for each other. Mean while my other ex we have gone through so much together, we both are young and we have alot of first time expiriences. In one hand I have my first love and the curiosity of how could things be different this time, in the other hand I have my ex which shes doing everything she can to get back with me, like everything possible. All this is so hard I know alot of people out there are going through similar things, I know we all are feeling like we are going crazy. I am happily married for an amazing man for 13 years. Six years ago he accepted a job oversea and came home for 3 months vacation every end of his contract and came back to work leaving me with our two kids. One time he conforted me to find someone elese to fill up his physical obligation as we missed our normal lovemakig. I had one guy I met in a party and we bcame friend and ended up in bed. I confessed to my husband and instad of getting angry or jealouse, my hubby approved me to have ilicit affair with a new guy as long as we used contraceptives to avoid me concieving as my husband does not want me to ge pegnant by this new guy. He was perfect in every way and everyone even the first guy could see that. His dad separated us about half a year ago but we still talk and still have some hope for the future. The first guy and I have become close even though I still believe the second and I are perfect. I really love them both more than anything in the world. But my ex is also wonderful. My ex would be more emotionally and financially stable but the first guy is just so.. I had four children whe we met 12 yrs ago I had just gotten divorced. We have a 8 yr old child together. My children look at my boyfriend as their step father even though we are not married. It was a long distance relationship. He now lives in the same city as I DO. My boyfriend has been working out of town for a yr. My kids found out also and they are upset with me. I decided it was best to move with my boyfriend but now I miss the other guy like crazy. I feel like not only am I homesick but I am also depressed. The other guy is very hurt he wants me to go back home. Does anyone have any advise? I see I am not by myself. I was with my current bf for 4 years, recently I ran into an old bf whom I had been in and out of love with over a 20 year period. I broke up with 2x. We recently got back together, it crushed by current bf. Well, what a huge mistake I made to ever leave my bf of four years. I ended up breaking up with the guy of 20 years for the third time because he is so mean and inconsiderate towards me, and has no desire to communicate with me when I bring up his rude ways. My bf of 4 years is 12 years my senior, but he gave me the world and loved me very deeply in a way I have never ever been loved and cared for. I left him initially, because I got bored, but what a big mistake. I called him and begged him back because I realized I still loved him, and I missed his deep love for me. I still think about the other guy when I listen to certain songs, but I am not going back. Gonna stick with the bf of four years- the love is real, and after all, that is what I really desire in a man. I miss his hugs. I live in Washington and I have been in a very happy relationship with a guy for almost 7 years. My mom recently had a horrible accident, and she lives in New Zealand. She almost lost her live, but thank God, she lived through it and is going to fully recover. I at first had an innocent crush on him, but now after a few months, my feelings are growing. I love my boyfriend very much and I miss him terribly, but at the same time I cannot get this doctor out of my head. The attraction is so strong. In the last 7 years, I have never felt this feeling, apart from when I met my current boyfriend. I might be here in NZ for another few months and I know if I got some alone time with this doctor, things would happen. I know that new relationships are fun, and after a few years it always becomes a bit of work. I know all that, yet I cannot help but wonder. Should I pursue and see what happens, or do i just shut down, try to forget and get back home to my man? By that time, he already had a girlfriend. I was so confused because he would still call me late night and we would talk about anything. I started to like him even more. College came around, he told me he broke up with his girlfriend…I thought that possibly he would be excited to be with me or something…he asked me to come see him as if I was his gf…that was such a confusing request…I said no. During all that time, I started seeing other people. I met this amazing guy. I dont know if im holding on to what could have been????? If I could drink a pill to make me forget about him I would….. Married to the man I love and any woman would want to love.. The passion I feel is indescribable. I have learned at 40 it is ok to feel like this. I am never leaving nor wish to leave my life. Yes, I have cheated.. If you loved your partner there would be no reason to try to find someone else or be with someone else. I am sorry when you love someone you would do anything to protect their heart from breaking! To me it just sound like you are self centered and like instant gradification! Do you think either of your partners could actually trust you ot believe anything that you said! Eventually both would get sick of your shit and move on! I love him very much and our relationship is beyond perfect. He loves me just as much and has never treated me wrongly. The trouble comes in when my ex bf came back into the picture. Now before my current bf, I was completely madly in love with my ex. We had planned a future together and everything was just right. Think is we broke up because of something so unreasonable we both found it to be a mistake later on. Just a few months ago my ex came back and we started talking again. All my feelings for him are back again. I told him I have a bf now but he told me to break up with him BC we are meant to be together. But like I said.. I never was over my ex. For the time being my ex is at boot camp for the marines and wants to get back together when he comes back in 3 months. I have till then. I love them both dearly. We have been through it all. Kids, bankruptcy, unemployment, you name it and we have weathered it together. Our love was mature, solid and happy. Then, an old friend came back into my life. I loved him when we were kids and talked with him a couple of times throughout the years, but just seeing him, and talking, brought back all the old feelings. Try explaining that to your husband. You can be in love with two people at the same time. Your love can be in different stages or on different planes and still be true love. On the other hand, you only live once and my time, though not immediate, is coming to an end. There is not a single answer. He was only supposed to be a hook up, just something different. Now I find myself no stop thinking about him. I fell in love with him hard. We text each other everyday, on his lunch breaks and when he gets home from work. My husband brought up the fact that he can tell that I fell for the other guy and mentioned a 2 weeks separation, i would like to do that but i dont want to hurt my husband or children. I met a girl shortly after and started dating her. I was always curious about women, so I thought this was my opportunitity to see what was out there. Little did I relize that I fell hard in love with her. The problem was I never completely stopped communicating with my ex. So here I am 10 months later in a relationship with a woman, not ok with my sexulaity and in a relationship with my ex. I know that I am being unfair to both but I cannot choose between them. But then another guy asked me to go out with him. Convinced that my first love would never want me back, I accepted. So my boyfriend and I grew attached to each other and our relationship was perfect. Just then I saw the first guy again, and a friend of his got him to admit to me that he liked me. At that point I was completely confused. But then again, every time I speak with the other guy, I feel so wrong and out of place. I have two equally great guys. The first one has been friends with me since I was born. He has always been there for me. He is my rock. My go to guy. We realized we really like each other. In fact I love him. I trust him and he would never let harm get to me. Only problem is he has a girlfriend who he is very fond of and I have a boyfriend who I love and adore. He has proven to me on such deep levels that he truly loves me and would never hurt me. Neither my best friend or I want to leave our current companions for each other but, there is a burning jealously of each others significant other. Little while later were at his house and one thing led to another and he attempted to kiss me. He failed because the moment was interrupted by my six year old niece walking in the room. I wanted the kiss to happen so badly at that moment I was excited and full of bliss. Later my thoughts began to pan out. I began feeling guilty. He is so sweet to me and I believe he loves me. Then I go to my boyfriends house and can be just as happy with him as I am with my friend. These two are driving me insane. I can not have both and I simply can not choose. From that single point alone, comes the first bursting of your cheating bubble….. We lived together with his roommate. We were all good friends. Our roommate was a guy and he owned the house we all lived in. I was so in love with my boyfriend and became great friends with the roommate. It was amazing getting attention from two men. The roommate was single. After a few years the roommate sold his house and me and my boyfriend moved out on our own. I started hanging out with the roommate and his girl friends. I was getting all kinds of attention from the roommate. I started to fall in love with him. I moved away with him even. I really wanted to move away from home and be somewhere warmer with a better economy. He wanted to live down the street from his parents practically. Well, this was all 3 and a half years ago. I still love my ex. I love the roommate who has now been my boyfriend for the passed 3 years. I just recently told my ex that I was with the roommate. My ex and I have talked on and off this whole time. My boyfriend knows that I still love my ex. My ex knows that I am with the roommate. I have been honest now with both of these men. I went 3 months without talking to my ex and felt as though I was going to go crazy from not speaking to him. He still loves me too. I hate feeling this way for them at the same time. I just feel so unhappy. I think I might just be addicted to my ex. I thought telling him the truth about the roommate and I would set me free. I find that loving both persons is hard and u do tend to lose both if u try to hold on to it for too long. But making the choice is never easy and i feel like it gets harder as time goes on. But no one should feel that loving two persons is wrong and feel obligated to leave the old flame for the new or the new for the old. Its a decision i think that u must choose if u can live with in the end and that if ur partner can live with it. Recently she started to develop feelings for one of her female coworkers and we had a threesome. I ended up developing feelings for her because we are so alike. I love her and I love my wife. This other love of mine is 9 years old than both my wife and I, but that changes nothing. We share so many things in common. Recently she started to develop feelings for one of her female coworkers and we had a threesome. I ended up developing feelings for her because we are so alike. I love her and I love my wife. This other love of mine is 9 years older than both my wife and I, but that changes nothing. We share so many things in common. However, recently I met a guy who is younger than me. He is a broken lil chap, but he is really charming and caring towards me. We could go on talking for a million years. Should he have had more in common with my boyfriend, I might not have developed such feelings for him. U are not in love with 2 people it is physically impossible. U may lust one and love the other or be infactuated. I am in this situation. My wife of 7 yrs told me she is still in love with her ex husband but she loves me and I need to move on so I can be with a better person for me I deserve the best. Thats a crock of crap considering its the same type of elementary bs as its not u its me speech. Being one of the men in this 3 way relatiinship. U should fess up and ditch one of the people u are supposedly in love with. If u fell in love with a 2nd person then u werent in true love with the first. Meaning its over and if u consistantly try to be in a demoralizing relationship with 2 people u will fail with both people and get what u deserve and be alone. U obviously have something wrong with u and should take a year off of relationships and work on ur self. Work on not being selfish because u clearly have an issue with this. Society really looks at you in disgust it sucks. I see there are a lot of similar but different problems many others have had. Robin was the only one who sounded to have something similar to mine I fell for two guys one who lives far and one who lives in my town. Quick summary: I have been in a Long Distance relationship with someone I met online for about 6 years now. And around 2013 I ended up getting into another relationship with a friend in my hometown and. Beginning Story: I met guy1 online. I have terrible memory , but Somehow guy1 had managed to reach me by text during valentines night. By then it had been months since he had talked to me so he said and I was already in a relationship. But that night he told me how he had never forgotten about me ,I mean he remembered my number and my MIDDLE name! No matter what happened we still loved each other. Thing is this guy ended up being guy2 in the end. And because guy2 lives where I live we did a lot together. Thing is around last year of 2013 when making things official with guy2 around October ,I was still talking to guy1 for a little until he decided he would go to the army to build a future for me and him a foundation as he called it. I thought he was joking. During the duration of no communication with guy1 I have been both good and bad with guy2 we had some happy moments and some annoying moments almost enough to want to break up for good,but this guy loves me so hard almost as hard as guy1 that I over sighted things and passed the lines. Felt kind of out of it like our relationship was unstable. Something wrong always happens and frankly I felt exhausted but I still show love for him. I felt so crappy. But what was weird was that it happened on the same day when I decided to break up with guy2 , how ironic. He asked if there was another guy which is funny because he used to make jokes about me having side niggas, turns out he was the other guy so I ended telling him the truth , they both deserved it ,but it sucks to hurt people u love and care for. But I also love and care about guy1. Its hard idk what to do or decide on. Any advice or critic as long as helpful is appreciated. What I did not expect was that A confessed to me two days later and on the same day we went official. I liked him and had feelings for him but my getting attached to him at that point in time was more of needing to get away from the confusion i was facing. But anyways things developed well between A and me, and we went pretty far sexually not all the way but almost there , and for a period of time we were all each other needed. I completely fell in love with him and never thought about B or C in that way anymore. Then came in the stress and problems from a hectic school life we are all 18 and things started to get awry. He has a best friend, whom I shall name K. On her birthday, he went out with her and blogged about her in the most sweet way possible, writing that his life was made for her and such stuff. I sought out many friends to talk about this problem and all the other problems that have emerged between A and me and all my friends had the same advice — break up with him. It took me a while to muster the courage to break up with him because i was madly in love with him. One day we talked about all the things that we have been keeping inside us and he suggested we take a pause in our relationship. I agreed, and knew that this was the best for the both of us. And that was not my definition of a pause. I felt like he was breaking up with me to focus on his studies and life and only wanting to be with me when he was free of troubles. It was like I was never on his priority list. I spent a few weeks feelings horrible about this, and slowly being all moody and stuff, and i finally made up my mind to break up with him. We had our dance concert and about a week later i sought him out to break up with him he avoided meeting me, always giving the excuse that he was busy so i did it through a 3 page long text. He did not reply the text and i felt altogether crushed. He continued to ignore me even in school and i started to develop separation anxiety and social anxiety and mild depression. I almost cut myself, but i confided in one of my teachers who knew him too and she helped me out of it. At around this time we were 4 months into our relationship and after we broke up, i began to get close to C again. We studied together from the start as we both had the same studying place and he has a girlfriend, from the start, so i forced myself to give up on him in the past. He was really concerned and would always ask me if anything happened or if there was anything to update him about. I knew i used to have feelings for C so i kept supressing it because he had a girlfriend and i wanted them to be happy, and many times i have gave him advice for him and his girlfriend. But I started to develop feelings for him unknowingly. I would look forward to studying with him after school, and talking until late at night, when i would finally go home, and i could see that he was really happy to see me everyday too. We became really close friends and talked about anything under the world, and we had similar habits and cliqued really well. Time passed and our big exams finally came. I realised that the feelings never passed in the start. He was one of the few whom I could feel genuinely happy with when i had depression, and I really enjoy talking to him and spending time with him. Either that, you are inlove with two people or are afraid of reality. I was the other girl. My friend and I crossed the line of friendship and were both surprised by what we found in one another. At the same time, he has been dating a girl for over six years who had broken up with him because he chose a life of solitude. When him and I got together I talked him into marriage, and told him that I believe he would make a very good husband and a dad one day. He believed me, and he went to find his ex girlfriend and proposed marriage to her. He did not say anything to me about this, but he started drinking so heavily that made me suspect that something was not right with him and when I enquired, I found out what he has done. It is the most painful thing ever. It was a sticky confusing situation for him I suspect, but I hope he is coping now with me out of the picture. Seeing him drinking and doing things out of guilt was hard on me, not that it is any easy on me right now either anyway. But yes, things happen when we least expect them to. It is not selfishness, and I guess the sooner we accept reality the better. Im a man whos been in a relationship for around 6 years but a year ago I met another woman. We spent so much time together, talking, laughing and flirting that it was inevitable thatbwr would form a bond. Then suddenly i had to move away and didnt see her for over a year. I drowned myself in work and making new friends and tried to forget the feelings I had for this other girl whiost still being with my partner. Then all of a sudden we meet up again and im confused. I know i love my gf but im also in love with the other woman. Ive told my gf about it and shes quite supportive but i cant commit tk her because I feel guilty about my feelings for the otger girl. Worst thing is the other girl probably knows that I have feelings for her, but im too afraid to tell her for fear of ruining a friendship if she doesnt reciprocate those feelings. But at the same time i know that she does have more than a lustful attraction, but neither of us are brave enough to make the first move. Its a confuaing and quite frankly, depressing situation to be in amd i wouldnt wish it on any other,,not even my worst enemies. My boyfriend of 6 years and my best friend who is my ex. I never really stopped having feelings 4 my ex. I really wanna be with both of them. I can see me marrying both of them and having kids with both. The only problem with my ex is he lives in a different state. It was then that I started talking to a friend of ten years. He is a very calm, dependable person, 15 years older to me. I liked talking to him, then we started calling more often, and it was exciting knowing a person. We had a lot of similarities, and he started getting close over the phone. As he is married with two kids, I tried to tell him not to cross the lines. But when he did, I could not keep myself away. I was too much attached to him. And I had begun loving him for his inner self. We first met a year back, and since then we have met thrice. We also went on a vacation last December, when I tried telling him, that irrespective of the fact that I love him, and could die for him, its immensely painful that he goes back home to his wife. He told me he loves both of us. We even contemplated the possibility of all staying together. I know, his wife will never accept it, and perhaps, even I may not be too happy for long, but still I found myself accepting the idea. Which in itself is the most peculiar thing I have ever heard of. I did not believe in it myself, but I am even ready for that, just to be with him. So, thus my days were moving. In love and pain…. Then something else happened. I had fallen first time in love, 19 years ago. I loved him with complete devotion. Finally when I let him know my feelings, he did not love me back. But there was no hard words there. Then he got married. I never had him, so I did not lose anything as such. It was painful, but there was peace in my heart. In my life, whenever I had been badly hurt, I took refuge in my first love… within my heart. Four years back, when I was visiting the city where he stays, he asked me if he had hurt me. This led to exchange of emails and calls. I told him about myself.. So, we have been friends since then. I meet him once every month, at his place of work. And then he came for lunch at my place. The frequency of his calls increased. And we talk more often now. He used to talk of going for a day-trip, but mostly it was just a mere suggestion. I used to look forward, or be serious about it, and be hurt when it did not happen. But just a week back, he wanted to take me for a trip. I had looked forward to it all my life, but today I was not so sure I wanted to go. It was the closest we were in the last 19 years. And more than how I felt, it was his feelings that were warm, and his growing attachment, that surprised me. He told me that day, that he had read all the emails I had sent him earlier, where I had expressed clearly all my thoughts and emotions, because I was very sure that he never would read them. He said thats how he became attached to me. After two days, he wanted to go out again, and we did go for a few hours. That day I had a bad headache, and he was so caring and so concerned, and this is the first time I saw this side of him. We both know, we are getting closer. And there was a time, when I would give anything for this. But today, I am confused. I know both men are married, and I would have none for ever. Then why still this pain? Though we are well within the limits of friendship, my heart feels completely at home with my first love. And that brings in a feeling of guilt, for the other person, whom I had completely submitted myself to. If he would be mine, or me completely his, my decision would be easy. But, with him away from me, and his stay with his family.. I feel left out and bitter. At such a moment this new surge of emotion is warm. But I am not as happy as I should. My biggest fear is getting hurt again from my first love. I do not want that at any cost. Else, I would not be able to survive. One is my husband of almost 9 years. I love him deeply and absolutely love the life we have built together. However, as he has gotten older, he has struggled more sexually. We have been swingers since we got married and have had one regular partner for 7 of the 9 years we have been together. This man is the second person I am in love with. A couple of months ago my boyfriend moved into our basement. The first several weeks were chaotic and full of emotions as we attempted to adjust to the situation. After some talking, most of the kinks have been worked out and I rotate every other night with them. I figure at some point one or all of us will end up hurt as this lifestyle can only be sustained for so long before one or both men will want more and more time and less sharing. I did not intend on falling in love with the second man, it just happened after years of passion and friendship. One with 4 years of history who has been away for 2 years and the other a best friend that grew into something more intimate. It is not easy to share something this personal for the entire internet to see. I for one, almost never comment on anything of the sort. Yet I am so grateful to see a numerous amount of men and women in the same boat as myself. Although our situations are all a little different, humanity finds peace in general commonality. Still love them both as much, still friends with the girl I made sad.. Which would probably be equally good. Maybe there something in me that needs healing. I have always had multiple boyfriends and eventually we ll broke up. Now I have two men who seemed to love me very much and I feel so guilty living one of them as this is something that I ll have to do. This is soooo hard. I currently am in love with two people. My best friend for years is currently my girlfriend. I recently met a young man whom Ove become head over heels for. I have never felt anything for another guy I always thought I was 100% straight until I met him. We clicked very fast and have gone through a lot emotionally since we met. I have currently slept with both of them now, pretty much right after the other. If I could hold him with my right arm and my girlfriend in my left and never let them go ever I would die happy. I have spent a lot of hours now going back and forth cuddling endlessly. Is that why I love hem both? Feels the same to touch, same tempurature, same horoscope. They way my heart feels when I hold either of their hands is exactly the same. It honestly has kind of bf. It makes me feel good inside too when I get to see them both together. I never want it to stop. I love two people like soul mates. Well, about 3 weeks ago, he insisted we take a break, which tore me in two. I was depressed and I missed him soooo much. He is the love of my life, but the problem is that I believe I love another guy now too. A couple times actually. He treats me perfectly now. He was also the first and only person I have had sex with so far, so he holds a big place. On the other hand, I wanna try someone new. My life revolved around him, I would literally see him everyday, then I got a truck and started going to truck meets, never expected to fall for someone else, I met this guy, we just had an instant connection that I had never experienced, there was that spark that was missing in my own relationship. I felt so guilty, but I guess it happens.. I hate seeing people in pain. The way he looked, the way he acted, I wanted something else. Me and him started talking and hit it off instantly, the minute I looked at him as more than just a friend I could never get my mind off him. I always felt so guilty talking to him with these feelings because I have my boyfriend. This other guy moved out of state so I cant see him, He wants to buy me a plane ticket and be with him. Which moving to a different state is a big deal for me. Today I have to make a choice of which one I have to be with. It is hard to deal with. I have a boyfriend of 4 years that I believe myself to be madly in love with. Until recently I realized that I have feelings towards a friend of about 6 years. We had a thing that never ended in a relationship but we both knew we wanted it but due to some unfortunate events it never happened. I moved on and am now with my boyfriend. Well I thought we could remain friends but he is still in love with me. And I think I am too. I feel like such a horrible person. I know I should just choose to be single again until I figure myself out. What I have decided to do is to not choose either but choose me. Figure out who I really want by being alone. Maybe the one who truly cares will really show it when I am single? Good luck to you! And not yet an adult or so, I have sufficient understanding of Life and the World.. I am in the EXACT same position as you. I have been with my boyfriend now for a few years, we live together too. I have friend who I used to like back when I was 13 and now, 10 years later, I think I still have very strong feelings for him. I know he loves me very much. But the hard part is, so is my boyfriend. He had lost his wife of 40+ years a few months before, unbeknownst to me. He and I had no connection all those 40+ years, and we live 800 miles apart. I found him, we made email contact and it was good. We were interested in seeing each other. I showed up for a short visit and voila — all the connection feelings and love from years ago resurfaced. He has a strong connection with the other woman, but there is something so essential between us, we have to explore this even at risk of someone getting hurt. We have now visited each other a few times, and daily spend hours on the phone and FaceTime. The other woman is feeling threatened but I cannot help that, I have to think of myself and him first, while we see if there is enough there to recreate our lives together again, and if we want to do so. A therapist friend told me the other woman might have served an essential purpose in his healing process, getting him through it, and readying him for his next step. His presence had always cast a pall over my life, and affected every other relationship including over my own long marriage that ended in divorce some years ago. Clearly we love each other intensely, now we need to see if we still like each other enough to make a life together. So he loves two women, and we are both trying to figure it out at 60+ years old. One lesson I already learned — to go with the strong feelings I have — in my case, the need to visit his city and see him, that coincided with the passing of his wife and him being at a point afterwards where he could be receptive to re-meeting me. I had no expectations going in and it was a total surprise that we both connected in the way we did. By the way, no sex until the second visit, when he came to my city to visit me. And that was a good decision. Love is about commitment, which is a decision. Which means your choosing NOT to be in love. I like a girl but I just started dating this one guy 2 weeks ago. At the time I felt stronger feelings for him but as i got to know this girl I am growing more feelings for her! I really love them both and I feel so confused. I started dating my current bf 9 months ago. We have gotten ridiculously close, and developed into a mature love that i believe can flourish. However, very early on in the relationship about 7 months ago a very close friend and I admitted we had feelings for each other. We started having sex every time we went to parties together. At first, even though it was always a bad thing, I thought it was just some lustful fling that we could easily put an end to. No strings attached, right? Time went by and the other guy and I never stopped. Over the summer, he was across the country and we continued to stay in contact. Meanwhile, my boyfriend was not across the country, and we continued to grow closer. He was my rock, with him I felt completely safe. The other guy and I helped each other through a lot. After all, he was my best friend before this started. He was always sad. The only time i saw him genuinely happy was when he was drunk, which was more often than was healthy. We lasted about a week. That same week, my boyfriend wrote me a letter, telling me I saved him by always being there for him and how I was so kind and genuine. It was so sweet, it made me cry. But the crying was out of guilt too. I love him, God i love him. When i saw the other guy again, things were different. He told me he really missed me. We were at the beach, completely sober, and he told me he loved me. I started a new job a few years back and within a few weeks i had become very close to my assistant manager. She had every asset I would want in a long term partner in terms of personality and looks and we made each others days in work really enjoyable. The problem was I was a 21 year old, really only just starting my adult life. She on other hand was a 29 year old with a long term partner with whom she had bought a house. With her being in such a serious relationship I never even considered that she would feel the same as I did so I never tried to make anything of it, I respected her too much to try and disturb what I thought was her happy home life. I had a few mini relationships with girls that I would talk about with her on our bus journey home from work to the town we both live in, she always seemed so interested, but i always just assumed she was being nice by asking me things, like any normal friends do. She had told me before she was transferred that she knew job vacancy was opening up in her new place of work and that she would do anything she could to get me in. I did end up transferring over and we were as close if not closer than we were originally, spending our days together and texting and talking on Facebook, we were joined at the hip, but still her life at home was the same as ever. I started seeing a girl my own age, which at this point was 23. A beautiful, shy but loving student who lived in a town only an hour away. The first time I met her I knew she was special and after a few months of dating we entered a relationship together and I was happy! I had finally found somebody to fill the hole in my life that I had hoped my assistant manager would fill before hand. Everything was perfect and I had fallen in love again and this time I knew for sure I was loved back. After working in the new workplace for about 8 months I got a new job and completely left the company I had worked for the previous 2 and a half years, the days leading up to my last day were emotional and my assistant manager made it quite clear just how much she would miss me and would always stay in contact, by this point we really were furniture in each others lives. After I had left for my new job, I felt could distance myself a little from my the woman I had spent so long admiring and forget about any feelings that I still had for her. I had spent 10 hours a day, 5 days a week for the last 2 and a half years pretty much side by side with my now former assistant manager, there was no way my new girlfriend could be as close to me as that. I was glad to be able to still see all of my old colleagues without having to go into my old place of work, which did sometimes feel like I was imposing. Well you can imagine why! I could feel the flirting on her behalf intensify, the drunken nights out and the texting and the phone calls I had with her all of a sudden became way more suggestive than ever before, still not giving too much away, she told me without ACTUALLY telling me that she wanted me, it was like cryptic messages in things she said and did and with me knowing her so well I was well aware of it. Yes you guessed it, another way of my old assistant manager keeping me close. Shes now left her partner of 12 years and has told me she loves me and is determined that we are meant to spend the rest of our lives together, or at least to try and give it a go. I feel like the biggest traitor in the world and have never been unfaithful up until this point in my life. I am definitely in love with 2 people at the same time. The relationship is not good, but we still love each other and we share many things in our lives. My new boyfriend is younger than me but he is everything I want! I feel somehow relieved.. Just know somewhere out in the world there is a lost soul struggling the same struggle as you. Best of luck to you love. What do I do? I feel guilty for having eyes for someone else, but I always remembered that my partner cheated on me constantly with multiple girls, and I still took him back. I could say I was one of those dumb girls. The other guy was sweet and caring when my partner was always insulting me , making me feel bad about myself and so much more. I wanted to go with the other guy , but it never happen.. Because of my decisions wanting to stay with someone who I had hoped will changed in the future. My fear was to start new with someone else, because of the same reason.. I hate to break hearts???? But eventually I will have to do it.. But good thing i found this site. Im goin to tell you about my love life and i have no idea what to do :'. My current age is 16 and i really need your help asap and im kind to read all of your advices or suggestions for me. My bf and i gone through a lot of hardships especially our contact is not known and hidden. And i always hide my phone. The problem is the age gap of my bf which my parents strictly didnt allow me. But i still continue this relationship. But i love hugging kiss and cuddle and i think thats normal in relationship. I dont know what should i do. I also feel im being loved through efforts and patience of this guy. I dont know what to do. I dont know if im stupid crazy or what. But good thing i found this site. Im goin to tell you about my love life and i have no idea what to do :'. My current age is 16 and i really need your help asap and im kind to read all of your advices or suggestions for me. My bf and i gone through a lot of hardships especially our contact is not known and hidden. And i always hide my phone. The problem is the age gap of my bf which my parents strictly didnt allow me. But i still continue this relationship. But i love hugging kiss and cuddle and i think thats normal in relationship. I dont know what should i do. I also feel im being loved through efforts and patience of this guy. I dont know what to do. I dont know if im stupid crazy or what. But good thing i found this site. Im goin to tell you about my love life and i have no idea what to do :'. My current age is 16 and i really need your help asap and im kind to read all of your advices or suggestions for me. My bf and i gone through a lot of hardships especially our contact is not known and hidden. And i always hide my phone. The problem is the age gap of my bf which my parents strictly didnt allow me. But i still continue this relationship. But i love hugging kiss and cuddle and i think thats normal in relationship. I dont know what should i do. I also feel im being loved through efforts and patience of this guy. I dont know what to do. I dont know if im stupid crazy or what. I fell in love with another guy who is actually amazing.. I find my bestie really compatible with my life.. Torn between these two men. I was so confused, so devastated. I left my husband for another man. And then was so happy with the second guy and still am, but started missing the husband shortly after. I love them both to death and cannot make the choice, it is affecting my life in all ways and I wish I could just not let it happen. But it happened in the moment when me and a husband were going through some misunderstandings. Now I am so deeply in love with this new man, who by the way is just a man of my dreams, but my husband wants me back and it bothers me and it almost feels right to give the hubby another chance and stop that brand-new relationship. But I so deeply love them both… wish I was stronger. Constantly having to lie to someone you love and constantly hurting them. I had an ex-girlfriend whom I had dated for a year and I broke up with her because I needed space. During that time away, I met someone else that sparked my interest. Not only was I physically attracted to this person, but I connected with her in ways that I did not connect with anyone else. Soon that turned into dating and I blindly initiated something without paying attention for my unaddressed feelings for my ex. The relationship went really well for the first three months — call it the honeymoon phase or infatuation — but when things got tough, and this period ended, the blinds came off. I noticed things in my partner that were not pretty. All of my feelings for my ex-girlfriend came to the surface at once. I cried miserably at how blind at I had been. Not only blind to the actions of the girl I was with, but also about how I had ignored my feelings for my ex-girlfriend. I made a rash decision and broke things off with the partner I was with and I ran to my ex-girlfiend in hopes of rekindling what we had. My reckless talks of love and apologies made her melt and she took me back with a smile on her face. I thought I had gotten so lucky and that everything had been resolved, but I was wrong. I had destroyed my newly ex-girlfriend. I was selfish, ruthless, and inconsiderate. No matter how strong my feelings were for girl one, I had no right to just drop girl two in the air. It practically happened over the night. Actually, it literally did happen overnight. Even though it was a new relationship, and a short one at that, I loved that girl. I loved that girl so much. I shared friends with her, I ate with her, I closed my eyes in bed next to her, I even worked with her. This was someone who was a very busy person, but she dedicated her time to me. She worked two jobs and went to school full time, but she made the time to listen to my long stories and she attentively listened to me even when I talked about irrelevant things about my day. No matter how bad her intentions were with some of the actions she took, this girl loved me with all her heart. What seemed to her like a great relationship — one in which she had finally opened up to someone, one where she had finally let someone in to be by her side instead of always being tough and independent, one in which she had no confidence in, but she had completely fallen for — just died overnight. The shot that must have crossed her heart must have been unbearable. Words cannot describe the pain that I feel for my actions a year and a half later. I still dream about her and I still have lingering feelings for what it was and what could have been. Moving forward is always an answer, but its hard to move on when the wound still stings. My ex-girlfriend who had just taken me back thought that her prayers had been answered, but she had no idea what was coming to her. She was longing for me to come back to her, she still loved me from the time that we had spent together and although she knew that I had started dating someone else in the time that we were apart, she had faith that I would come back like I did. Once again, like with girl number two, I was blinded by the thought of being back with my ex-girlfriend. I thought that I had made the best decision in my life. I spent a good month with her until little by little I got knocked down by my feelings for girl number two. I kept thinking to myself that maybe I made a mistake. I told this poor girl the truth about the turmoil in my head. These news broke her heart, but she loved me so much that she sat with me through it. She listened to what I had to say and told me that if I really thought I made a mistake, I would be breaking her heart, but that she would support my decision. This girl was an angel. Someone I did not deserve at all, but I obviously did not see that back then. She was by my side as I was struggling with who to be with. Eventually, I was able to get back with the girl I had broken up with overnight a month back. She was furious at me, and she was hurt, but again I was selfish and inconsiderate, all I thought about was my own feelings and how I could make things right with her for myself and not for her. We got back together and she hated what I had done. I did not see that the damage I had caused was too great for us to reconcile. She had grown insecure and did not trust me. She did not trust my actions or my decisions. She was constantly angry with me and demanded that I do things that would make her feel better about what had happened. Desperate to remediate and salvage my relationship with her, I listened to and followed every word she said. Each time I threw away something that my ex had given me, I felt so much pain, I felt like I was throwing away a part of myself, a good, happy, joyful memory. Each time I deleted a picture, it was painful, and that feeling kept growing, but I did anything to be just be on good terms with her again. There is no period in my life in which I had shed so many tears. The pain broke me and each time I had to do something like this, I was just clinging onto the idea that I have already gone this far and what more could she ask for. She did not just want me to forget her and make her feel forgotten, but she wanted me to break her with my words. This is the worst thing I have ever done in my life. I have hated myself for doing this for so long. Needless to say, after much arguing and emotional abuse, I agreed to do this. I met up with my ex and told her what needed to be said. It was the first time that I had gone into a conversation with someone with the full intent of hurting them. Typing this out makes me sick. I cannot believe that I was so emotionally broken and lost that I went through with this. I did this to the same girl I called an angel earlier. The same person that took me back, the same person that sat with me when I thought I made a mistake, and the same sweet girl who loved me and had done nothing wrong to me. The pain was unbearable and it still haunts me to this day. Once the deed was done, I was in so much emotional pain. I loved these two girls, but I had hurt them so much and I was in a place where I did not know if the decisions I had made were right. My ex-girlfriend contacted me and begged me to not let her go, to please keep her as a friend, and that she knew that there was no way that I meant the things that I had told her. I was weak and vulnerable, not that its any excuse, but I budged, and I broke my word once again. While I was trying to fix my relationship with my girlfriend, I kept a secret friendship with my ex. I knew this was wrong, but I was so emotionally twisted that my judgement was impaired. I was almost like a drug addict, I knew continuing down the path I was going was just going to lead to worse things, but I needed to continue doing this to relieve me from my pain, from my heartache, and from the hate I had acquired for myself. I had become deceitful, sneaky, calculated, manipulative, selfish, and obsessed. If anyone though that things could not get worse, they were wrong. The secret friendship I had with my ex turned into something more. I began to cheat on my girlfriend with my ex. This back and forth ordeal is disgusting to think about in present day, but it takes someone to live through this to understand how one can get to this point.

And so do I. I always knew something was off in my life and so did everyone else. Actually, it literally did happen overnight. Can friends not love more than one friend. You have two lovers, and you get to have solo the fun all the time. So well we did for about 5 months now and he and my friend got a little serious, but this past week they decided to call it i love two people. Crushes come and go, and even if it does turn serious, you always have the si of walking away from a new prospective lover if you must. While hardly backed by science, this movie is an apt metaphor for how true love can override our perception of possible flaws in the target of our devotion.